I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
