hell yes lets make some ravioli
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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