is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
