I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
