This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
