Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
