it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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