I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
