I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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