I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
