he wants to bone in the snuggie
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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