We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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