I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize