He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize