I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
