The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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