how can u be prego again
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Can you bring me the toilet please
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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