This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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