Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
