some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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