shes about as inviting as chlamydia
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
