the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize