i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Randomize
