Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
