IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
