So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
