i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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