I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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