Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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