You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Randomize