With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
