in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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