This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
