Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
We named our party play list daddy issues
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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