He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
