I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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