So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
