i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize