I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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