So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
