wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
