wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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