OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
