He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
