I just saw a hot homeless man
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
