i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Randomize