Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
