hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize