My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
