Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
