it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize