I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
