id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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